We say that relationship is “toxic”, when it feels really bad to be in a company of that person. You might be aware that you are anxious, fearful..?, even dizzy and nauseous; basically , you just want to leave the room!
There might be a number of people in your life who feel toxic to you: your work colleague, or your mother in law, your ex or your neighbor.
In this blog we will focus on the toxic relationship in a context of romantic love, for it is so different from any of the scenarios referred to above.
Anyone who had been in a love relationship for long enough, would have learned that the spectrum of the emotions is wide, and the amplitude of their intensity is huge! from the very high to the very low, and it honestly is possible to love them and hate them all at the same time.
So what do you do? Give up on a person who stopped being “all pink and sweet”, or channel the intense emotions between the two of you into something beautiful??
The latter, I think.
Let us look at a few love stories within the famous novels:
“He knew she was foolish, foul and a liar, but he desired her all the same”. Émile Zola, Nana
The count who was in love with Nana, did he think she was toxic?? Perhaps, but he didn’t care; she was the love of his life and more important to him than all his family and his great riches, that he threw to her feet.
In fact, this seems to be the defining feature of a great love:
The inexplicable fact is that the blinder love is, the more tenacious it is. It is never stronger than when it is completely unreasonable.
-Victor Hugo
Another infamous -tragic, but beautiful- love story, is that of Catherine and Heathcliff, in the Wuthering Heights by Emily Bronte:
He is more myself than I am. Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same; says pretty lady Catherine about Heathcliff- a man who was commonly known as a violent and rough mannered “monster”.
In the second part, we will discuss the healing aspect of the toxic relationship and will also touch up on the topic of ” bestiality”.
Stay in love! :o)